Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Maria Duval - Making The Most Of Now

Making The Most Of Now
?You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.? --Henry David Thoreau (1817-62) American writer, author, naturalist

How do you actually spend your days? Are you focused and committed to everything you do? If you are, that?s wonderful! But if that?s not you, does this ring a bell? Are you spending a lot of your day thinking about what has happened to you up to this moment? Or are you waiting for something to happen, for the right opportunity to come along, to get some more time, make some more money, meet the right person? Are you dreaming of what might happen next week, next month, next year? STOP!

Each day you are given is a gift. It is time to value every moment. We all have 24 hours a day. No more. No less. The clock is ticking and there will be no second chance. You cannot get time back once it has gone. What do you choose to do with your 24 hours? Are you letting life just happen? Decide to take control. Stop rushing. Savour every moment as it happens. Take note of everything around you. Be in the moment as it happens. Listen to the sounds, observe other people, see the buds on the trees and shrubs, the spring flowers peeping out through the snow. Don?t miss what is happening now in your world.

Act as though this day was your last. What message would you like to leave? Treat everyone you meet with care, kindness and understanding. Communicate clearly. Make every encounter with another person important. Give them respect, admiration and courtesy and you will attract the same. Do what you are doing to the best of your ability. Make only commitments you can deliver. Trust yourself to say and do the right thing. Choose to be excellent in all that you do. Be more, do more, demand and expect more from yourself. Focus on what needs to be done now, on results. Prioritize your time ? don?t waste it. See every challenge or problem is a chance to grow.

Live your life on purpose, not by accident. The past ? it?s over with and should be nothing but a fading memory. The future ? it simply hasn?t happened yet and things you do today, now, are likely to have an impact on that future. Don?t compare your present situation to anything else ? accept it for what it is and make the most of it ? or decide to take action now if it is not the present you want. Acknowledge that nothing will improve unless you do something about it. Be happy. Don?t wait for events or other people to make you happy. Have some fun! Start enjoying your life ? now, today. Start doing things you enjoy or try something different. Keep your sense of humour, your sense of fun. Think ?This is my day of opportunity!? ? every day! Seize and enjoy every moment. Every morning is a fresh beginning. What are you waiting for?

Kate Harper is based in the beautiful Highlands of Scotland. Check out her website http://www.harpercoaching.com She works with people who are fed up with moaning about their lives and have decided to do something about it. If that is you, please take a look at Kate's website. Her special interest is in promoting Wellbeing through coaching. She is happy to work with people from any part of the world. "The distance is nothing; it is only the first step that is difficult." Madame Marie du Deffand Take your first step today and contact Kate.

Turn Your Hate into Happiness
I hate Mondays! I hate Birthdays! I hate Holidays! We hear these statements all the time from others and ourselves. Justification for our hatred of certain days isn?t hard to come by. Mondays represent the start of a workweek at a job we may despise. Birthdays represent the progression of years we all wish would move at a slower pace. Holidays tend to accentuate preexisting family feuds, loss of loved ones and economic low points. Some people take it a step further and center their anger on people or things.

I hate my cousin, nephew, mother-in-law, father-in-law, ex-boyfriend or next-door neighbor. I hate that dog who roams the neighborhood unsupervised, those kids that play loudly in front of my house or the Meter Reader who walks across my well-kept lawn. You may have some very legitimate reasons for centering anger and even hatred on these people and things, however, there is a price to be paid for constantly focusing on them and you may be surprised at what it is.

Almost everyone I know lives each day based on one or more sets of good or bad events. Those events dictate their every mood and help decide how they will live a particular day. This gives a huge amount of power to things, situations and people that they allow to influence their lives. That power is given away, not earned. In a culture obsessed with Psychology and Psychiatry, we are taught to believe that people, situations and things have power over us cause certain types of behavior. Instead of ignoring those influences, we?re encouraged to explore and understand them. While resolution is possible, it always seems to evade those who follow this path.

I know people who live on therapy and pills. I am not talking about individuals with legitimate mental disorders that may be successfully treated through medication; I am speaking about people who are told they need treatment because something in their lives is upsetting them. If that situation cannot be resolved, it should never be permitted to rule their lives. Some people spend all their time trying to resolve situations that should never have been allowed to overtake them. Sometimes we have to ignore, learn to accept or walk away from situations that we cannot control.

Everyone is different. Some people drive their vehicles all day blissfully unaware of what?s happening on the road around them. Others get upset and beside themselves if someone cuts them off or causes them to miss a light. Regardless of what sets you off in a positive or negative direction, it?s really all about allowing people, situations and things to have power over us. Most people have already surrendered their lives to circumstances. They wake up and allow everything around them to decide what kind of day they?ll have.

I always get a kick out of people I know who get angry with me for not being upset with whatever bad piece of news the media happens to be spewing out at any given time. ?Didn?t you hear what happened today?? Sure I did. It?s bad news. It has to be because most people in the news media know that good news just doesn?t sell. We are incessantly reminded by news reporters, political pundits and talk show hosts how important it is that we listen to them. Instead of making a well informed decision at the ballot box by voting for people we know will represent our particular viewpoint, we?ll told that we must constantly revisit every election by staying on top of government officials and all that they do.

The problem with being directly involved with every political, social or other issue on any given day is that it deflects us from what?s important in our own lives. I have seen more then a few people leave their families, jobs and anything that resembled a normal life to take on a cause they felt worth that cost. However, most of them were not in a normal state of mind when they made that decision. Instead of giving the matter careful thought, they responded to the call to a call for arms levied by other true believers.

There are people who leave radio or cable news channels on all day, then wonder why they are feeling so bad. I listen to the news; however, I do not allow it to decide what kind of day I am going to have. This doesn?t mean that I do not sympathize with people who have been hit by disaster, crime or some terrible calamity. I do. In fact, I have links on several of my websites for people to donate money, time or talent to help those afflicted by all sorts of disasters, economic situations and national tragedies. I care about and support various causes and charities like most other people. I just refuse to allow those things to overtake me on a personal level.

It scares me to think how much I used to allow everything happening around me to rule my life. It?s as if I was in some sort of a coma. I refused to happy unless something happened that gave me a reason to feel good. I lived based on the day?s events and everything going on around me. Needless to say, I was not happy a good deal of the time. I listened to experts on television and the radio and thought that maybe I was the kind of person who might have a tendency towards Depression. I was just about to seek help for being depressed, when I saw the light.

While watching television one morning, it dawned on me how influential the world around me had become on my life. I was watching the news early in the morning when one of my younger children came in the room. I switched the channel to some cartoons. I couldn?t help but watch what was on and started laughing. I went out that morning feeling really good. Why? Because my television had told me to. It provided some funny and uplifting entertainment that made me feel good.

Giving it some thought, I became upset at how much I was allowing all sorts of things happening around me to influence my life. I had joined the crowd that played the Blame Game. If someone in my family got me upset, I blamed them for ruining my entire day. If a friend or business associate called with bad news, it was their fault that I couldn?t function to my full potential that day. Not only did I blame others for my feelings, I blamed myself!

If I wasn?t feeling good most of the time, there must have been something mentally wrong with me. I automatically assumed that I needed therapy, pills or couch sessions to solve this imaginary problem. Fortunately, I tried something else before taking any of those steps. I decided to feel the way I wanted to feel each day regardless of my circumstances. After making that decision, it almost seemed ridiculous how much power I had allowed people and things to have over me. Not only did that decision change my personal life, it changed the way I did business.

I stopped allowing Nay Sayers to influence every business decision I made. Since the day I was born, people had told me about all the things I couldn?t do. They had decided that I fitted into a certain mold and needed to exist within that narrow expression of economic happiness. Not all of my business decisions have been good ones and thinking outside of the box hasn?t always benefited me. However, moving beyond people?s expectations and making decisions based on what I know about myself instead of everything happening around me have always been good steps in the right direction.

If you want to survive the daily grind and move beyond the influences of everything around you, it?s time to stop living based one what life tosses your way. It will not be easy. Misery loves company and everyone around you will miss the influence they have on the way you feel. You will not always be happy, but you will have the ability to be happy, sad or otherwise based on deliberate choice. You can either handle your emotions, or allow them to handle you.

Author: Bill Knell Author's Email: billknell@cox.net Author's Website: http://www.billknell.com Terms To Use Article: Permission is granted to use this article for free online or in print. Please add a link to or print my website address of http://www.billknell.com

Re-Visioning
Radical Consciousness is the means by which we can re-invent the past and dream the future into a new reality. Radical Consciousness is not stuck in any concepts from the past or future. What happened in the past is an appearance only. You can re-live the story, and bring about a new ending. You wrote the script the first time; you can re- write it. There are as many histories as there are viewers of history. That's why it is so hard for juries to decide who is innocent and who is guilty. The important point here is to realize that you are not stuck in time. Radical Consciousness is not confined to any time or place. Consciousness is Eternal in time, and Consciousness is the Fourth Dimension in Space. The Fourth Dimension is not something added to the first three dimensions. The Fourth Dimension includes, encompasses and interpenetrates the first three. Memory is just a recording of what appeared to have happened. You put your own spin on it, and your neighbor, although present for the same event, was in a totally different world with its own spin. You can re-write the script and the future changes as does the script. The Time Machine movies are true. You can re-visit the past and change the present. Or you can visit the future and change the present. Crank up the Time Machine of your Imagination and revise your past and future. Scientists may argue whether space is a function of time or time a function of space, but in radical consciousness we realize that both are functions of the imagination. History is His-story and thus it is My-story and Your-story and Our- story. History is open to re-vision. For example, forgiveness re-writes the past, the present and the future. Do not let past hurts define you. Tell yourself a different story this time with a preferred outcome. Write it down. Make up a play and act it out on the stage of your imagination. Create your own theater and cast of stars. Don't write it like you don't want it, or you will continue to have what you have now. History is very fluid. You dreamed up your interpretation of the events in your history and so you can re-dream it. You can get angry and curse at the guy who cut out in front of you, but you could also choose to be thankful that he missed you. You can hate your ex for all of his foolishness or you can imagine him waking up from it and thus you release yourself from all of the foolishness he saw in you. What you release on earth is released in your heavenly mind and what you bind on earth is bound in your imagination. So re-script every awful and painful thing that ever happened to you and don't re-live it any more. It is said that those who do not learn the lessons of history are doomed to repeat them. Those who would re-write history can do so. Just re-vision it the way you now want it to be, and it will be so. You have a second chance, it has been given to you already. Radical Consciousness is that chance. Take it. History was written through imagination and can be changed through imagination. Past, present or future. The past is not, as psychoanalysis has believed, determinative, unless you keep on remembering it and re-empowering it. You dreamed a bad dream; re-dream the incident as it could be or should have been. You thought carelessly; re-think it constructively. You acted foolishly; re-enact it wisely. You felt painfully; re-feel it harmoniously. You wrote amiss; re-write with accuracy. An "accident" happened; re- construct it into a blessing. A "trauma" happened; un- traumatize it. You "lost" something or someone; you can find it. You are in a bad mood; upgrade it. Radical Consciousness is in the business of re-visioning history. Nothing is impossible. Through your imagination, the world of possibilities just keeps on expanding. You are a possibility person if and when you can focus continually on the possibility you want. Every night before you fall asleep, review your day. If you did anything today that you regret or if anyone else did anything that bothers you, go back and change the story, change the outcome. In this manner you do not carry any burden from today into tomorrow. With regular practice, you will lighten your load. You will also realize the power of your thoughts and intentions in a new and profound way. Nothing is set in stone. Memory can be changed. "Behold, I make all things new." History was just an interpretation anyway, a very distorted perception and memory. It was all a soap opera. Forgiveness can be just as real as the offense. As you change the outcome to what you want, you will be able next time to do it right the first time. How you take things is how you experience them. You always have a choice about how you are going to take anything. Re-visioning means that you still have a choice. There are no victims, even in your past. The Infinite Good extends indefinitely into the past and into the future. Re-visioning is a new word for forgiveness. Re-visioning means that we let go of a judgment or an opinion. Letting go of judgments is a path of renewal because all such opinions of what is going on are ego assessments. All judgments, which leave out the Infinite Good, are false. The ego is incapable of true awareness. Forgive the false judgments of others and you are forgiven yours. You don't have to wait until the end of the day to re-vision. The sooner the better. If you practice immediate re-visioning, it won't be long before you catch yourself in the act and revise it before the mistake is even made. We are programmed by our ego. "There is no inevitable permanence in anything. Both past and present continue to exist only because they are sustained by Imagination on some level or other; and a radical transformation of life is always possible by man revising the undesirable part of it." Neville

Carroll J. Wright, Ph.D. is a professional counselor, spiritual psychotherapist, and researcher in the field of transpersonal psychology,as well as author of several books. He can be reached at: http://myspiritualpsychotherapy.com

The Value Of Associations
This past week I ran into a friend of mine who I hadn't seen in quite some time. It was good to see him again, at least for a few minutes.

Then I remembered why I stopped associating with him in the first place.

The guy has a big heart, and you can't help but love him. Unfortunately, he is also an incessant whiner.

He is always going on about how he doesn't make enough money with his job, and how things never seem to go right for him in life. No matter what you say to him there is no shaking his loser mantality. He has chosen to be the victim in life, and to be quite honest I think he enjoys it.

But it doesn't stop there. It's not enough for him to mope and complain about his own life, he does his best to bring the people around him down as well.

He asked me how my 'little internet business' was going. Remember it's been a long time since we had spoken last.

I certainly didn't want to rub anything in here, so I just told him politely that things were moving along and that I had quit my job as a delivery driver last year.

I could see the irritation in his face. This guy was genuinely distraught over my success.

He gave a grunt and said "Well good luck."

But he didn't really mean 'Good luck'. What he meant was 'I hope you fall flat on your face and have to go back to your old job so I can feel better about who I am'.

He's a loser because he projects nothing but negative energy into his own life, and he wants everyone around him fail and be miserable alongside him. No thanks.

I spent just a couple more minutes chatting with him, then told him I had to run.

I really do wish him the best, but I'm certainly not going to spend my precious time letting him sap the life out of me with his pity party no-hoper mentaility. There are plenty of positive, success-minded people for me to hang out with and that's where I prefer to spend my time.

There is a lesson to all this, and here it is.

Think of the most successful person you know. For our purposes today, let's define success as financial and emotional prosperity. This should be someone you know on a personal level, and not a character you've read about in your favorite business or glamour magazine.

Now, ask yourself who this highly productive individual associates with. Chances are the group of folks you identify with this question won't be a bunch of lazy, negative, self-pity freaks.

Now try the same excercise with the least successful individual you know. It's not too likely that your selection for "least successful" is a person who surrounds themselves with positive, productive human beings.

The kind of people we surround ourselves with will have a profound effect on our thought patterns. Since it's safe to say our reality starts with our thoughts, the value of our personal associations can hardly be overstated.

To spend the majority of our time around people who offer us doubt and discouragement is to limit ourselves to a bleak shadow of our full potential. Alternatively, by mingling with those who project confidence and optimism, we are sure to absorb an attitude of determination and tenacity. It's good practice to socialize with individuals who reflect our aspirations.

People who want to whine and complain about how unfair life is, and how they just can't seem to 'get a break' are bad company. Especially when these people want to project their misery and negativity onto you.

One of the best things you can do for your own success and happiness is give these losers the boot and find some happier, more productive people to associate with.

Tim Whiston is a full-time entrepreneur and internet marketer. He publishes a monthly ezine, and is the author of a popular e-book entitled From Zero to Profit.

Reboot Your Commute
Commuting is one of those things that, if you are doing it, is something that you have to do rather than want to do. And if you have a negative attitude about your commute, it can quickly turn into something that starts to impact more than just the time you spend commuting.

Your attitude about the commute can carry into work, home, and play. When you arrive at work already in an agitated state, you?ll need a cooling off period or your productivity will be lowered. Time is wasted preparing for the commute itself, either by having to hype yourself up or by dragging yourself down. It can also take its toll of your health, whether it is from increased stress or weight gain. Needless to say, commuting takes away from time that you would rather spend on other activities.

Wouldn?t it be nice if you actually looked forward to your commute? It may seem overwhelming to try to picture the commute in a different way, but there are resources out there to help commuters change their perspective and even turn the commute into something positive and productive.

Following a simple program and making small changes is a great way to start turning your commute into a better experience. Programs are good because they provide structure and activities to see you through the needed steps and help you to understand
why the commute affects you adversely and how to change it.

One of the first things to do is think about what it is that drains you about the commute? Is it the time, the crowds, being away from home, fears and risks associated with traveling, or simply the boredom? In order to revert back to a time before the stress of the commute got hold of you, you first need to articulate what about the commute is draining. Then you need to do something about it.

Think of the commute as a tool that allows you to live your life in a better way. For example, instead of saying:

?I hate driving all the way to work. I wish I could retire. What?s the use of having a nice house when I don?t have any time to spend in it??

You could say: ?I commute to work so that I may live where I choose. In this way, I get the best of both worlds, a good paycheck and a good home. I even get to use my commute time in a way that increases my health and wellbeing.?

Figure out what drains you, then you can act on that and move forward to help make your commute a positive force in your life.

Dr. Mastria is founder of Commuter-Assist and has created a five step program titled, FIVE STEPS TO A BETTER COMMUTE available free on the Commuter-Assist website (http://www.Commuter-Assist.com). Dr. Mastria's website is designed to help commuters get the most out of their commute and life in general. To contact email info@Commuter-Assist.com.

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