Maria Duval - Malice In “I Wonder Who I Am” Land

Malice In “I Wonder Who I Am” Land
For many years I maintained confidence in my personal identity. I knew exactly who I was and was quite comfortable in my skin. Although, I must confess my skin used to fit me better than it does these days. Recently several things happened to shake this confidence in my person. I don’t know about anyone else, but I take pride in my personal mettle. About two months ago my credit card company informed me somebody hacked into their records and stole my identity, along with approximately one million other customers. They went on to assure me that my account would be safe. It wasn’t my money I was worried about at the time but my identity. How can anybody steal someone else’s identity? More important than that, why would anybody want to steal somebody else’s identity? Especially somebody like me. In thinking about this I wondered, how much can I charge someone for borrowing my identity? I might have a cottage industry here in the making. Or, perhaps it’s just cottage cheese. I could understand if I were a good looking, rich tycoon with more dollars than sense. I’ve been looking for money all my life and have been unsuccessful. I am so poor some church mice have loaned me a dollar or two over the years. And if I ever see those mice again I aim to repay those loans. The way I feel about it is if anyone can get money out of my account, good luck to them, because I can never get money out of my account when I need it. In fact, I have a good mind to find these identity thieves and ask how they’re getting money out of my account. I’d pay good money to find the secret to that puzzle. The ATM at my bank stands for Automatic Thief Machine. It holds me up from getting to my next appointment with cash and never returns my card. A second incident furthered my identity malaise. A few days ago, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and Yours Truly were in a little bit of a tight spot. Actually, it was I in the tight spot, which is nothing new for me. I can’t remember the events leading up to the spot I found myself but my wife looked at me, placed both hands on her hips and declaimed, “Who do you think you are?” At the time, I did not know quite how to answer that philosophical inquiry. I mean, she has known me for over 35 years ,and for her not to know who I am at this point is just a little bit puzzling to me. At the time, I must confess, I was a little confused about who she thought she was. Being the gentleman I am, I kept my befuddlement to myself. My selfhood perplexity deepened. One day this week, I was going about minding my own business n which is a full-time job with part-time pay and no benefits n when I bumped into an old friend. After we exchanged a few pleasantries, he looked at me and said, “Is there anything wrong? You don’t look yourself today.” Now, the question plaguing my mind was simply, if I don’t look like me, who in the world do I look like? I simply smiled and mumbled something to the effect that recently somebody had stolen my identity. Frankly, I was surprised someone noticed it. In thinking about this, I wondered when someone’s identity is lost where does it go? Is there a lost and found department somewhere for lost identities? Then an awful thought tugged at my mind. What if someone lost their identity, went to the lost and found department and, by mistake, picked up someone else’s lost identity? How do I know it hasn’t happened to me? What proof do I have that I am who I say I am? The evidence before me is quite overwhelming. A major corporation in the United States has informed me that someone has stolen my identity; my wife asked me who do I think I am; and a friend I’ve known for years tells me I don’t look like myself. Talk about having your reality check bounce. I must confess to times when my mind does wander a trifle. But I refuse to accept the judgment that I am absent-minded. I grant you my mind, on the odd occasion, does take a little break every now and then, but it is never absent. This recent identity crisis caused me to do a little evaluating about my personhood. Who am I really? I jotted down a few notes: son, brother, uncle, husband, father and grandfather. Although I’m not old enough to be a grandfather, I do accept the privileges of this position. After all, I’m living with a grandmother, so it is easier just to go along with the program, if you know what I mean. Then a marvelous thought poked its way into my mind. How it got in with all the clutter is beyond me. The thought was simply this; I am also a son of God. This is based upon a wonderful verse of scripture. “But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name.” (John 1:12 KJV.) I’m unsure about many things, but one thing I am confident in is my relationship to God.

James L. Snyder is an award winning author and popular columnist living with his wife, Martha, in Ocala, Florida and can be contacted at jamessnyder2@att.net.

Face Your Fear
Have you ever asked yourself “why do some people just find it so easy to talk” I have stood back so many times and just watched people talk. They looked so natural. It seemed so easy for them. As for public speakers �" well they were just in another league. How could they just stand there in front of so many people and the words flow out of their mouths so easily, the confidence they oozed. It just wasn’t fair. How did I end up with the stumbling, speechless mouth? This was my belief for many years. That was until I started to really really want to conquer this communication thing. I wanted to find out why I was different. I started searching and asking questions and found that I wasn’t so different. Most public speakers I have talked to said they were so nervous before they did their speech, even the ones I thought were brilliant, I overheard asking for reassurance as they left the podium “was I ok, did you hear the bit when………., I stuffed that up” etc etc. As for one on one conversations when someone knew no one, I found out that people usually have 2 or 3 key questions they ask before the conversation starts to flow. For example, hi I’m ……… do you mind if I join you? Or hi I’m …………. isn’t this a great party/meeting/event ……..…… So I started to really, really listen and observe how people looked so natural. I slowly stepped forward and started talking, I built up my confidence and soon talking became so much more natural. I reflected back and realized the following: I had put all the fear in to my own head. There were many people who felt the same way. I asked myself these key questions. What am I afraid of. What is the worst thing that can happen if I speak up? I thought back to my childhood, what had happened all that time ago that could have affected me for so long. It was quite simple really. As a child I was told “children should be seen and not heard”. I was raised in a family where we were not allowed to have an opinion as children and if we said anything, “out of line” we were punished! So I learned to “shut up”. Fast forward to adulthood, in my subconscious I still had the thought that if I said the wrong thing at the wrong time then it would cause conflict. I am still not a confrontational person, I love peace not war. So instead of saying the wrong thing, I said nothing. In a group or big crowd, I would so want to contribute so badly, but my fear kept me paralyzed. Until I asked myself those key questions What am I afraid of ? What is the worst thing that can happen? So I stepped outside of my comfort zone and took the first step. I opened my mouth and talked!! I have never looked back. Now I can speak up in front of people, even in a crowd. Saying that though, I still do not speak up if I feel there will be confrontation. This is something I still need to learn to deal with and feel comfortable with. I have no hesitation now asking a question or becoming involved in any conversation that I feel comfortable in. In fact I am finding it fun and surprising myself by becoming quite the chatterbox!! So ask yourself “why can’t I say what I really want to say”? It is only sounds coming out of your mouth that make words Are you afraid of the words, or are you afraid of the consequence and what may occur if you say what you really want to? Ask yourself “what is the worst thing that can happen if I say this?” Expect the best outcome (9/10 times the worst never ever happens) and Face your fear. Speak up and feel the freedom. To say what you have always wanted to say visit www.alwayswantedtosayit.com

Annette & Tracey have overcome obstacles and wanted to share their insirational lessons with you through their website www.alwayswantedtosayit.com

Loaner’s Remorse? A conversation between Juan Carlos and a billionaire named Yu.
Loaner’s Remorse? A conversation between Juan Carlos and a billionaire named Yu.

By Carl Pantejo

(Excerpt from: “My Friend Yu �" The Prosperity Mentor,” copyright Carl Pantejo 2007 �" Y.N. Vurce Publishing. http://www.ynvurcepublishing.com)

Note: In this article The Original Substance is the name used for: GOD, The One, Gaya, Infinite Intelligence, The Universe, etc. Please substitute this name with whatever name/word you are comfortable with.

A conversation between Juan Carlos “J.C.” and a billionaire named Yu:

…Even though I have a Master of Business Administration degree, I chronically found myself in the same situation: Too much month left over after the money. My friends thought I was a sap, too nice all the time. It’s just that when I saw someone in need, I felt compelled to help. Here in Thailand, it seemed that EVERYONE WAS IS NEED! IN NEED OF MY MONEY! Crying women would come over to my apartment and tell me all their troubles. I believed about one-half of those tales of woe.

“…In Asia, unless you are a bank or a loan shark, it’s common knowledge that there’s really no such thing as “loaning money” to people you know, you simply give it. If they pay you back, fine; but realistically, you shouldn’t expect to ever get it back. Consequently, I ended up giving, not loaning, a lot of my meager teacher’s salary to those people I believed were telling me the truth about their current crisis. Unfortunately for me, and I’m sure you’ve noticed this too; almost all Asians believe that all foreigners are wealthy, “Walking ATM’s”! This lead to most of the recipients to not repaying any money back at all; even when they were able to; because those foreigners are all rich and don’t need the money anyway.” I said, with the bitterness that comes from “loaner’s remorse.”

“J.C., first off; don’t let your friends make you feel like you’ve been a patsy, a pawn that unscrupulous people have manipulated in the past. Your friends have a narrow view of the Universe. And you need not feel depressed at the “lost money” you gave away. If you gave it away with goodness, a truly honest aim to help another human being in a real crisis (no ulterior motives, no strings attached); you will surely get a magnified, return of goodness back from the Universe. It may not be from the same person you helped; but from someone else they positively affected, or the person of the person they affected. It is okay to know that (and expect) a return of goodness from your benevolence. It will enable you to keep the faith and continue giving graciously, cheerfully. The mistake most people make in giving is to expect the positive return to come from the one, particular beneficiary (or beneficiaries) of their good deed. It doesn’t usually happen that way.

The Original Substance keeps perfect “karmic accounting records.” Sometimes many little good deeds on your part are “saved up,” then a huge positive return from the universe is given to you (usually in the form of something you really needed and always at the perfect time). It is inevitable. So, never feel taken advantage of or get into a depressed state over possibly giving something to someone that might have been undeserving. Just give and let it go. The Original Substance always remembers the spirit in which your gifts were given and, in its wonderful and surprising way, rewards you with a magnified return of the perfect goodness for you, at the perfect time for you.

One caveat: If the same people are chronically in need of your financial help and have grown always to depend on you instead of trying to help themselves, then this is not a crisis; it is a condition, a negative condition. In such instances, the best thing to do is show them how to better themselves. You’re not doing them (or you) any good when you nurture that kind of disempowering dependency. It’s the classic “give a man a fish” principle.

So what if some people were dishonest and accepted your money on false pretenses? You may never know; so let it go. Why waste time, energy, and emotion on an issue that may, or may not be true? And if you find out later that, yes, you were taken in by a con artist, don’t hold a grudge. FORGIVE THEM - NOT FOR THEM, BUT FOR YOU. THERE’S NOTHING POSITIVE FOR YOU IN KEEPING THE NEGATIVITY INSIDE. HARBORING NEGATIVITY WILL ONLY ATTRACT MORE NEGATIVITY. Rest assured. The Universe will still remember your true intentions and reward you; while returning an appropriate, magnified payback to the wrongdoer. Acting on true, honest intention is your job. Doing things in the Certain Way is you job. Fulfilling your desires and managing consequences is the Original Substance’s job. In the end, it’s all good…”

(Excerpt from: “My Friend Yu �" The Prosperity Mentor,” copyright Carl Pantejo 2007 �"Y.N. Vurce Publishing. http://www.ynvurcepublishing.com)

Carl Pantejo
Pantejo@ynvurcepublishing.com


About the Author:

He is a retired U.S. Military veteran. Believing that school was too boring, he dropped out of High School early; only to earn an A.A., B.S., and MBA in less then 4 years much later in life �" while working full-time as a Navy/Marine Corps Medic. In spite of a fear of heights and deep water, he free-fall parachuted out of airplanes and performed diving ops in very deep, open ocean water. He went to Thailand 1 year ago for a week’s vacation, fell into a teaching job, and has never left!

Carl Pantejo, Pantejo@ynvurcepublishing.com
Author, "My Friend Yu - The Prosperity Mentor”
Founder, Y.N. Vurce Publishing
http://www.ynvurcepublishing.com

He is a retired U.S. Military Veteran. In spite of a fear of heights and deep water, free-fall parachuted out of airplanes and performed diving ops in deep ocean water. He is currently teaching English in Thailand.

Reclaim Your Life- Live In Balance
Reclaim Your Life- Live In Balance Copyright � 2005 Mark Susnow Inspire Possibility http://www.inspirepossibility.com



"I don't have time to get together with you. I have to finish this project." Or the conversation might go like this. "I've been overwhelmed at work and I'm too tired." Do these conversations or variations on the theme seem familiar? We have lost our ability to live in the moment and to be spontaneous. We are consumed by our "to do" lists and our responsibilities and obligations.

Living a balanced life is a dynamic process that involves making a series of adjustment much like sailing. When the direction or intensity of the wind changes, you have to adjust your sails to keep the boat sailing in the direction you want.

And that is your life...The winds or circumstances of your life are always going to change. The sooner you can recognize these changes the better

Sometimes, when you are out of balance and sailing off course, it's obvious. At other times, you need to pay attention to the signs or signals that are letting you know that something isn't right. These signs or signals show up in many different ways. Health issues, relationships issues, financial issues and many other challenges are there to remind you to look deeper into how you are living your life.

In this fast paced world, you need to be prepared to adjust to the many challenges you will be faced with. Taking time for quiet reflection in the morning and beginning your day with calmness, clarity and focus is the best preparation for the day's challenges. However, instead of starting the day with calmness and focus most of us start the day in a hurry like we're trying to catch a train and have developed the sense that we won't have enough time to get it all done. To compensate for this constant state of anxiety, we have developed the habit of working harder and longer. As a consequence, we don't have enough time for the things that give us meaning and pleasure.

Changing this pattern is not easy. It involves leaving the familiar to enter the world of the unknown. The fear of exploring the vast unknown keeps many individuals trapped in an unfulfilling career or relationship and from exploring new opportunities. Other fortunate ones are blessed with that spirit of adventure and are able to embrace the unknown and its opportunities.

The fear of fully expressing who you are also contributes to this pattern. It is this fear that keeps hidden some of your deepest needs, feelings and insights. It is only when you are your most authentic that you have the deepest impact on others and experience real freedom. Being less than authentic deprives many others of your gifts and contributions.

It takes courage to live an authentic life and to be true to your values. Living true to your values and priorities is not as easy as it seems because as you expand and evolve, what is important to you will also change. For example, many busy clients that I work with want to have a relationship, but forget to ask themselves if they are willing to devote the time necessary to have one. Many have a desire to become a more interesting person, yet are unwilling or unable to devote themselves to activities or interests that make them so. Others say they want free time yet they are involved in careers or projects that are time consuming. When you have a passion, it's much easier to find the time to pursue it. When I was a busy lawyer, I always made time to play music.

Once you have developed clarity as to the life you want to live you are well on the way to making that life a reality. Having clear boundaries is the bridge to this life and affects every aspect of your life. Setting clear boundaries requires you to be courageous and to take a stand. It requires you to say "no" which for most people is the most difficult word to say. Many people are fearful of the repercussions if they say "no," and or reluctant to disappoint another. But think of the alternatives, you end up agreeing to live someone else's life and resenting it. To put it another way, setting clear boundaries is about reclaiming your life and reclaiming your power.

You have more empowering choices than you realize. As you reclaim your power you will be living your life from choice rather than fear. Here are a few suggestions to help you with this inquiry.

* Take time each day for quiet reflection in the morning and for reading a personal growth or spiritual book. It sets the tone for the day. * Take some time to commune in nature. * Eat healthy and exercise and don't forget to smile!

Through "Letters on Life" and the many people I am blessed to be in contact with, I get to practice living a life in balance. As time goes on it gets easier and I seem to be supported by the synchronicity in my life. It's an exciting journey with new opportunities being presented constantly. I want to thank you for supporting me on this journey and for inspiring possibility in others by sharing "Letters on Life" with those in your circle. I look forward to hearing from you.


Journey On

Mark

Mark Susnow has a unique background. Formerly a successful trial attorney for 30 years, as well as musician, he integrates what it takes to be truly prosperous in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation practice. As a personal coach, leadership consultant and inspirational speaker, Mark provides inspiration and motivation to many business leaders and professionals. He knows what it means to have a big vision and has demonstrated the courage and energy it takes to accomplish it. Consider contacting Mark and be sure to visit his website: http://www.inspirepossibility.com